A virtual date, for the uninitiated, is the act of video-chatting a date instead of meeting in real life. It is often an awkward event for both parties and even more so for people with a reserved personality. Yet, the success of the video date can make it or break it for the hopeful suitor.
Many have never done it before and wonder how to proceed, what to wear, what to say, what to do? This article will give you all you need to know to have a successful virtual date that can lead to a real date in the future.
Dress nicely but do not overdo it
One of the most important things in dating is knowing how to dress. Whether it’s a real or virtual date, dressing nicely and appropriately for the occasion is a crucial rule in improving the chance of the date being successful. What you wear tells a lot about the kind of person that you are, your personality, and your sense of style.
In a virtual date, the rules of a date in general still apply. Make sure to wear something appropriate for the occasion. As a rule of thumb, if you wouldn’t wear it for a real date, don’t wear it either for a virtual one. Avoid the pajamas, the wrinkly old t-shirt, the tank tops, etc. Make sure what you’re wearing is clean, well-pressed with no dirty spots.
However, avoid doing too much. There is no need to wear a suit or a fancy dress. As the saying goes, too much of anything is detrimental. Keep it simple, yet classy and more importantly clean.
Clean yourself up
With businesses around the country — including barbershops and beauty salons — being closed, we understand it can be hard to keep oneself well maintained. However, there are still a few things that can be done at home to make oneself presentable.
For men, if you have facial hair, please trim it. No one will be attracted to the hair coming out of your nose. Don’t forget either to take a shower… the greasiness of your skin and dirt can definitely show on camera. Don’t for one second think that because the date is virtual that she won’t notice whether you are clean or not. It doesn’t take that much of an effort.
For women, please do your hair— Makeup if necessary. Remember this is the first time the person will see you in a live setting. First impressions count whether it’s real or virtual.
Clean your background
How many times have seen those memes with hot sexy girls taking pictures of themselves in a dirty, messy, and disorganized environment? Yes, definitely more than we should. You don’t want to be that girl or that guy.
Perhaps, even more so than how you dress, the state of your environment tells a whole lot about how clean of a person you are in particular, and about your personality in general. If your background is messy and dirty, your date will get the impression that that’s how you are in other aspects of your life as well–which is most likely the case.
Furthermore, the background either enhances or diminishes your looks. No matter how pretty or handsome you think you are, you don’t want to run the risk of losing the person’s interest just because of a messy room. Please clean up.
Choose a quiet place
You cleaned yourself up, you are dressing nicely and appropriately and your background is clean, so what now? Well, another important rule in virtual dating is to find a quiet place. There are multiple reasons for this that can be summarized in one sentence: you don’t want to distract your date with what’s happening or being said in the background.
If you live with other people, this is even more important. You don’t want your date to be hearing about the drama going on in their lives. And you also want to provide some privacy to the people you live with.
However, there are some exceptions to this rule. Your cute dog is definitely allowed… and even that funny little niece you have can definitely help to lighten the mood and make you more likable and approachable as a person.
Remember guys, girls love dogs and cute toddlers!
Have good lighting
Have you ever seen those Instagram models? So perfect in their shots–making you wonder if they are even real. Well, one of the main reasons why they look so good in pictures and videos is good lighting.
Depending on skin shades, the amount and type of light can make you appear more attractive and even slimmer. There is no rule of thumb to this, you need to experience yourself to realize what goes well with you.
You have everything set and ready to go. You look your best…what else can you do? Truth is a virtual date–perhaps even more than a real date–is an awkward situation. You are meeting the person for the time. You will be most likely a bit stressed about it. That’s normal.
But like with anything in life, you have to show confidence. Being shy can be cute, but too much of it can be detrimental. Speak, ask, question, engage your date. Make fun of yourself to lighten the mood. Joke around but be polite and considerate.
Confidence is even more important for men. Women want a man who can take control, who is funny, who is assertive. If you can’t show these qualities… your chance of getting a second date is lower.
Confidence is crucial. But a lot of men (and women) have a tendency to confuse confidence with cockiness. Don’t brag, don’t talk too much about yourself. Don’t interrupt. Don’t overexplain. In short, be police.
Start with a compliment, end with a thank you
Just like you would on a real-life rendezvous, it is important to compliment your date about something when the video chat begins. It can literally be about anything, their looks in general, their hair, their smile… anything. This helps to make the person more at ease as it conveys the impression you like something about them.
It is also important to say thank you at the end of the date. Saying thank you tells the person that you appreciate the effort they had to put in to agree on meeting on a virtual date. It’s all about being polite and charming.
Things to keep in mind
- The date does not have to be long. If everything is going well, and both of you have things to put in… sure go for it and keep it going. But anything above 30 minutes should good enough for an initial meeting.
- Be yourself. You don’t need to pretend. Do not overdo anything. The other person is probably as shy as you. No need to overstress.
- Do not be jerk and ask for inappropriate things. No sexual request, or anything whatsoever unless the conversation clearly and explicitly led to that. Furthermore, do not assume. If you have to wonder, then it’s probably not the case.
- Keep an open mind. You’re meeting with person for first time. They may end up not liking you. Or you not liking them. Do not take it personal. Be polite nonetheless.
- Do not request a second date on the spot. Before doing so, assess how well the virtual date went. Does she or she still talk to you as much as she or her did before. Or has anything changed. By doing so, you will not only avoid rejection but you will make them wonder if you actually like them. That surprisingly can increase their interest in you.
That being said, good luck peeps, and happy dating!