France is renowned for its rich history, sophisticated culture, and beautiful landscapes, but it also has some social customs and etiquettes that visitors need to be aware of. While the French are generally welcoming to tourists, certain behaviors or phrases may be seen as rude or disrespectful. Understanding and respecting these cultural norms will not only make your trip smoother but also show respect for the country’s traditions and people.
Here are 15 things you should never do or say while visiting France.
1. Assuming Everyone Speaks English
While many French people, particularly in large cities like Paris, can speak some English, assuming everyone will communicate in English can come off as disrespectful. The French appreciate it when visitors at least attempt to speak their language, even if it’s just basic phrases.
Why to Avoid:
- Assuming everyone speaks English may be perceived as cultural arrogance.
Tip:
- Learn some basic French phrases, such as “Bonjour” (hello), “Merci” (thank you), and “S’il vous plaît” (please). Even if your French isn’t perfect, it’s the effort that counts.
2. Starting Conversations Without Greetings
In France, it is important to begin every interaction with a polite greeting. Skipping a “Bonjour” (hello) or “Bonsoir” (good evening) before starting a conversation, whether in a shop or a café, can be seen as very rude.
Why to Avoid:
- Starting a conversation without a greeting can make you come across as impolite and abrupt.
Tip:
- Always start with a greeting and follow it up with “Madame” or “Monsieur” for added politeness.
3. Complaining Loudly About Service
France has a different culture of service compared to some other countries, particularly the U.S. Don’t expect over-the-top friendliness from waiters or shop staff, as French service tends to be more professional and formal. Complaining loudly or being demanding in restaurants can be seen as impolite and disrespectful.
Why to Avoid:
- Loud complaints or demands are viewed as rude and disrespectful in French service culture.
Tip:
- Be patient and polite when addressing any issues with your service. If something is wrong, address it in a calm and measured tone.
4. Asking Personal Questions
The French value privacy and tend to keep their personal lives separate from casual social interactions. Asking someone about their salary, political views, or personal relationships can be seen as intrusive or impolite, especially early on in a conversation.
Why to Avoid:
- Asking about personal details, particularly on first meetings, can be seen as overly intrusive.
Tip:
- Stick to light topics like culture, food, art, and history. Save personal questions for once you’ve built rapport with someone.
5. Expecting Stores to Be Open All Day, Every Day
Unlike many countries where stores are open late or even 24/7, French shops, especially in smaller towns, often close for lunch and may not open on Sundays. This can be a surprise for visitors who expect round-the-clock service.
Why to Avoid:
- Getting frustrated over shop closures during lunch hours or on Sundays can come across as culturally insensitive.
Tip:
- Plan your shopping and dining accordingly. Expect lunch breaks, especially in rural areas, and understand that many stores will be closed on Sundays.
6. Criticizing French Culture, Cuisine, or Wine
The French take great pride in their culture, cuisine, and wine. Making negative remarks about French food, wine, or traditions can come off as offensive, even if it’s just your personal preference.
Why to Avoid:
- Criticizing French food, wine, or culture, even in jest, can be seen as disrespectful.
Tip:
- Keep an open mind and focus on what you enjoy rather than what you dislike. If you must express a preference, do so tactfully.
7. Being Late
In France, punctuality is generally expected for business meetings, appointments, and dinners. While it’s not uncommon for social events like parties to start a bit later, being significantly late to formal occasions is considered impolite.
Why to Avoid:
- Being late is seen as a sign of disrespect for other people’s time, especially for formal gatherings.
Tip:
- Aim to be on time or a few minutes early for scheduled events. For casual social gatherings, being 10-15 minutes late is often acceptable.
8. Touching Produce at Markets Without Asking
When visiting French markets, it’s important to know that vendors typically handle the fruits and vegetables for you. Touching produce without asking can be seen as rude or unhygienic.
Why to Avoid:
- Touching produce without permission can come off as disrespectful or unsanitary.
Tip:
- Ask the vendor for assistance by saying “Je voudrais” (I would like) and pointing to what you want. Let them handle the selection.
9. Talking About Money
Discussing money or personal finances in casual conversation is generally avoided in France. The French consider money matters to be private, and openly talking about salary or wealth can be seen as gauche.
Why to Avoid:
- Conversations about money can be seen as vulgar or inappropriate.
Tip:
- Stick to neutral topics and avoid discussing personal finances unless you know the person very well.
10. Splitting the Bill
In France, it’s not common to split the bill evenly when dining out, especially in casual settings. Instead, one person may pay for the entire meal, and the next time, the other person will reciprocate.
Why to Avoid:
- Insisting on splitting the bill can come off as unfamiliar with French dining customs.
Tip:
- Offer to pay for the meal, and let the other person pay the next time. If you do need to split, it’s best to ask the server politely in advance.
11. Dressing Too Casually
While France, especially Paris, is known for its fashion, the French generally dress more formally compared to visitors from some other countries. Wearing sweatpants, flip-flops, or overly casual clothing in urban settings or to restaurants can make you stand out in a negative way.
Why to Avoid:
- Dressing too casually may give the impression that you aren’t respectful of French customs or the event you’re attending.
Tip:
- Opt for smart casual attire when exploring cities, especially when dining out or visiting cultural landmarks. Always dress neatly, even in informal settings.
12. Asking for Ketchup or Altering Dishes
The French have a deep appreciation for the art of cooking, and altering a dish by requesting condiments like ketchup or trying to change the recipe can be seen as insulting to the chef.
Why to Avoid:
- Asking for ketchup or changing a dish can offend the chef by implying their dish isn’t well-made.
Tip:
- Enjoy the dish as it’s presented. If you don’t like something, it’s better to leave it on the plate than ask for alterations.
13. Bringing Oversized or Inappropriate Gifts
If you’re invited to a French home for dinner, it’s customary to bring a small gift, such as a bottle of wine or flowers. However, avoid bringing chrysanthemums (as they are associated with funerals) or large or overly expensive gifts that might make the host feel uncomfortable.
Why to Avoid:
- Chrysanthemums and large gifts can be seen as bad luck or socially awkward.
Tip:
- Opt for a modest gift, such as a bouquet of flowers (avoid white lilies or chrysanthemums) or a bottle of wine. Make sure the wine isn’t too extravagant, as the host may already have a special selection planned.
14. Not Saying Goodbye When Leaving a Shop
In France, just as important as greeting people is saying goodbye when leaving a shop, restaurant, or establishment. Failing to say “Au revoir” (goodbye) as you exit can be seen as rude.
Why to Avoid:
- Not saying goodbye can leave a bad impression and seem impolite.
Tip:
- Always say “Au revoir” and “Merci” when leaving a shop or restaurant, even if you didn’t make a purchase.
15. Engaging in Public Displays of Affection
While the French are known for being romantic, public displays of affection (PDAs) beyond a simple kiss or hug can make people uncomfortable. Overly passionate displays, especially in more formal or conservative areas, can be considered inappropriate.
Why to Avoid:
- Public displays of affection can come off as excessive and inappropriate, particularly in formal or conservative settings.
Tip:
- Keep public affection subtle and respectful. Hand-holding and a quick kiss on the cheek are acceptable, but avoid anything more intimate.
Conclusion: Embrace French Etiquette for a Memorable Visit
France is a country with a rich and refined culture, and by understanding and respecting its social customs, you can avoid faux pas and enhance your experience. Whether it’s learning a few basic French phrases, respecting dining etiquette, or following social norms in public, these small gestures will help you make the most of your visit while showing respect for the local culture.
